How To Brave Travel If You Hate Flying
Travel anxiety, missing out and taking control of your future …
Words: Charlotte Rollin. Image: Josh Wang
Whilst for some the thought of digging out their passport, dragging a ridiculously overpacked case through the airport car park and enjoying a pre-flight tipple are all part of the holiday experience, there are a similar number of us that experience a nervous shudder even at the thought of boarding a plane. And that very fear can be enough to deter us from taking a holiday at all …
For so long I’ve forfeited girls holidays, trips with my family, and even a heavily subsidised trip to New York with my university, all because the idea of sitting in a confined space, with unfamiliar people and sounds for any longer than an hour is too much for my anxiety ridden self to bear. I used to struggle similarly on the London underground- the claustrophobic nature of this mode of transport getting the better of me on a number of occasions. Combine this with a dramatic experience of hopping onto the tube as a child and hearing those anxiety inducing ‘beeeeeps’ as my mum was left on the platform and my sister and I zoomed away into the darkness, you could say I have a ‘thing’ when it comes to public transport.
And despite the fact this experience traumatised me for years as a child, the underground has become a bit of a no brainer for me now. No doubt this was helped by moving to the big smoke during my placement year of university and a quickly acquired necessity to put up with its loud and unbearably hot ways to get from myself from A-B. The accidental exposure therapy I undertook with the tube is something I’m sure could help my fears of flying too, but let’s be realistic here and note that my bank balance would not thank me for booking regular trips flights for the sake of personal growth (although I think a visit to Bali would do me wonders ….)
But the years of turning down trips or wistfully browsing Airbnb with no intention to make a booking have taken their toll. Social media can be a dangerous place for comparison, but it really has highlighted to me the experiences I may have missed out on whilst my peers have been sky diving in Sri Lanka or tanning in Tel Aviv. At the tender old age of 20, I felt like life was passing me by without a hope of me catching up on these missed opportunities. Two years on, I still worry that I’ll never tick of the endless cities or beach breaks on my list, but at least I’ve been able to make a start. The realisation that life won’t wait for me to be ready shocked me into action. And whilst youth and the idea of the freedom you experience in this period is nothing more than a societal construct, that very same pressure has given me the shake up I needed to take a leap and renew my passport after all this time. I hope the following tips will help any other anxious girls make their wistful travel dreams a reality …
It’s All in The Details: Seating Arrangements:
Whilst to anyone else the window seat is a go-to option for studying the view, it might be one to avoid if you’re prone to motion sickness or would rather imagine you’re anywhere other than on a plane *gulps*. Finding your ~groove~ with in-flight habits like your choice of seat is something that comes with experience when flying, and it really can make so much difference in reducing anxieties whilst in the air. I would recommend either the aisle or window depending on the specific anxiety you experience around flying. The window seat can help you settle into what feels like your own, more sheltered area on the plane without the fear of needing to move to let others out to the loo or stretch their legs. Alliteratively, if you’re likely to become fidgety and want to get out of your seat at your leisure- the aisle option is the one for you. You’ll have more space to stretch your legs out and can easily pop to the toilet or stand up if the flight is a particularly long one, making the aisle my preference when it comes to taking a flight if I haven’t in a while.
“Whether it’s a Starbucks muffin or a Leon halloumi wrap, having a delicious treat to look forward to is one of the simple ways to make the experience a more enjoyable one! Tip: avoid Monster Munch or a tuna sarnie if you’re hoping to befriend passengers sitting next to you …”
Eyes Closed, Headphones On:
Creating a calming environment in which you can mentally take yourself out of the situation that’s making you anxious is my go-to technique for getting through a challenging experience. For me, the take off and the initial unknown of a flight (as it may have been a year or so since my last holiday) is the point where I’ll struggle most. The nosies and speed associated with taking off can be a lot for your senses to take in, and anxieties can become heightened when you’re feeling overloaded with information. I try to remove myself from the situation as much as possible, closing my eyes to avoid the temptation to look out of window and instantly regret seeing the ground disappear further and further away- because realistically who can avoid doing the thing that you’ve explicitly told yourself NOT to do??
I’ll pop my headphones in at this point too and play my prepped in advance playlist of songs that make me feel good and happy in advance of what is actually going to be a really exciting experience- once the flight is over! Since distracting my senses from what’s really going on around me, I’ve found the whole process of flying a much more bearable one. It’s likely that once you get in your travel groove too you’ll feel the same sense of relief.
Entertainment Expert:
Getting your organisational hat on ahead of a flight is the best step you can take in making the experience as controlled as possible, ensuring you know how you’re going to fill your time and again distract your brain from overthinking ‘how does a plane really stay up when it’s so heavy??"‘- that’s definitely a Google search for another day…
Netflix and YouTube are my go-to’s, and I’ll normally pick a couple of films, vlogs or episodes of the series I’m watching at the moment to pass the time in a way that calms me and feels familiar. I’d avoid picking a film at random or going for something that’s likely to put you on edge- your best bet is something you know you enjoy and will keep you hooked enough to prevent your brain from wandering.
Time To Feast:
Now this really depends what time your flight is (although who turns down an opportunity for food realistically?) but buying something delicious in the lounge before boarding is a great way to give yourself something to look forward to mid flight and help in breaking the journey up a bit. Whether it’s a Starbucks muffin or a Leon halloumi wrap, having a delicious treat to look forward to is one of the simple ways to make the experience a more enjoyable one! Tip: avoid Monster Munch or a tuna sarnie if you’re hoping to befriend passengers sitting next to you …
Organisation Opportunity: The Holiday Itinerary:
Whilst if you’re anything like me you’ll have been planning the details of your trip for months in advance, the time you have to kill on the plane can be the perfect opportunity to finalise details of your trip and exactly how you’ll spend your precious time away. The lack of Internet connection on most flights could limit this, but as long as you have the basic information ready ahead of your flight, you should have all you need to put together a schedule that excites you. Channeling nervous energy into something productive is a great way to cancel out negative feelings, so even bringing some work with you to finish before your holiday begins can be a great distraction to stop your brain going into overdrive.
So that’s it! The simple tips that saved me from travel passing me by and allowed me to step onto 2 planes in 2019 without a panic attack in sight! Travel anxiety and the methods that work for you individually may vary slightly, but I hope the premise behind this piece will help give you hope for a future in which flying is feasible and get you ready for 2020 and any travel plans you hope to achieve ….