The Fear of Not Doing Enough In Your Twenties
The pressure to be living your ‘best life’ thanks to the highlights reel nature of Instagram is something many of us can relate to. In today’s submission, Kat is giving us a gratitude lowdown in appreciating the little things and living a life where fulfilment comes easy …
“I woke up this morning and made a cup of tea, listened to Norah Jones and that was enough. I felt content.
I soon realised that my morning was very different to the ones on my Instagram feed. As I waited for the kettle to boil, I watched other people enjoy vibrant and far more exciting mornings than the one I was having. My morning no longer felt worthy. I was overwhelmed with the pressure to do more, something more impressive, something cooler.
Why wasn’t I jogging in pristine gym gear as the sun rose? I should be wandering the streets of New York with a coffee in one hand and a camera in the other. Why didn’t I organise to meet my friends for brunch in that dinky cafe in the city?
“Why is my morning so mediocre?” I wondered.
And then I realised the source of this self-conscious feeling was Instagram. That little app has the power to diminish your self-worth in seconds, because we’re all under the impression that life is only ever good enough if it is lavish, glamorous and looks good with the Ludwig filter over it.
It is only now at 25-years-old that I realised that what we see on Instagram isn’t the be all and end all of life. I have so often beat myself up for not doing enough in life, but there is beauty in the quiet days and the mediocre moments too, but I think society fails to see that.
The land of OOTD posts and filtered photos of French toast has blinded us.
In 2020, I want to remind myself and everyone else that life doesn’t have to be this vivacious show all of the time. You can jet off to Paris, show off that beautiful & Other Stories dress and upload the photos of your best friend’s wedding, especially if that makes you feel happy, but don’t be ashamed of the mornings when all you do is sit in your pyjamas and watch old episodes of Gilmore Girls. Life is about balance and we need these calmer moments more than we realise.
Accept the quieter times. Allow yourself to appreciate the simplicity of life on a Saturday morning. Curl up under your duvet, listen to the wind as raindrops trickle down the window pane. Sip on a warm cup of coffee, text your best friend and tell her about your week and then sit back and just be. These moments are dismissed and forgotten about in a world so obsessed with being busy, but they are worthwhile.
These essential moments help us to reflect and breathe and take a second away from this hectic world where everyone feels the need to be ‘on’ 24/7. Just because it isn’t splashed all over your Instagram feed doesn’t mean it isn’t valuable. These moments let us reflect and revel in the little things like how tea tastes so much better when you’re at home, how your cat’s ears twitch when she sleeps, the smell of scrambled eggs in the kitchen, the warmth of your favourite jumper on a miserable January morning, the joy when your little sister texts you, the fact that you can have two bowls of cereal if you want to.
We need to be grateful for the everyday things we take for granted like catching the train with seconds to spare, buying fresh tulips, the smell of freshly baked croissants, your little cousin’s obsession with scrunchies, old jokes that your college friends never forget, the way your mam wears her ‘good coat’ on a Sunday, chocolate buttons and hearing your Dad sing along to Springsteen.
They can bring you just as much joy if you learn how to appreciate and value them. Don’t let Instagram fool you into thinking that life is solely about those surreal, thrilling experiences. Some of my fondest memories are of those magical days- seeing Fleetwood Mac, meeting Matt Haig and visiting Disneyland Paris- but I was filled with just as much joy when I visited my Nanny for tea, bumped into my old teacher in Tesco and heard my favourite Taylor Swift song on the radio, because I have realised that those everyday joys can make your life so much richer if you just step back and realise that they’re there.
Do as you please and embrace every chapter of this story, especially the ones filled with tranquility.”
-
To read more of Kat’s work you can visit her website here: scribblesbykat.wordpress.com or find her on Instagram at @katoconnor.